As I’ve posted about before, Roxanne and my relationship has been a male dom, female sub one. I’ve done all of the topping. Now, she wants to switch that around, she wants to spend some time playing dominatrix to my sub male.

She is a wonderful woman and mighty cute so I am happy to oblige.

I do wonder a bit about our relationship and our way of playing though.

While playing the relationship has been fully bdsm based, lots of torture, lots of the use of roles, very little vanilla sex. I presume for this time that roles are reversed it will be much the same.

Outside of the play though we maintain a relationship of equality and I don’t think that either of us want it any other way.

Another interesting quirk is that we haven’t done much in the way of domination and submission; it’s mostly been purer sadomasochism.

I wonder, with this lack of D/s, with this desire to switch things around, if what we truly desire isn’t something different from bdsm as it is usually practiced. If what we really desire is simply violent sex. The opportunity to torture the hell out of each other as we fuck.

Do we want or need someone to be top, another to be bottom, or do we just want to beat the crap out of each other? Time will give us the answer I know.

Perhaps this is all semantics, it is certainly nothing to worry about, but I have found it interesting to think about. The relationship, and our way of relating together are outside of my experience, outside of what I had the opportunity to enjoy within my prior bdsm relationships. That can only be a good thing as variety always lends excitement.